Saturday, 4 July 2015
BOOK REVIEW - On Grieving the Death of a Father - Harold Ivan Smith
Title - On Grieving The Death of a Father
Author - Harold Ivan Smith
Format - Paperback
Buy Link - Click here
Synopsis - Not many books have been written to help the grieving son or daughter deal with the new reality of a deceased father. Smith has combined personal stories from Frederick Buechner, Norman Vincent Peale, Corrie ten Boom, James Dobson, and many other well- known people to help others through their grieving process.
My Story .......
Death.... It's a word that is so final. It's a word we don't like to think about or talk about. So we don't.
15th May 2014.. It's a day that will stick in my heart forever. My beloved Dad, who was in hospital with fluid on his legs, was just told he had to stay in whilst they drained the fluid off. He assured me I should go on my holiday of a lifetime to Canada and Alaska. A trip he had done and loved so much.
My Husband and I had been there a week and then got the dreaded phone call you never want to hear. It was my Mum and she asked to speak to my Husband straight away and I just knew. My Dad had been sent home, despite them not having reduced the fluid on his legs; despite saying he couldn't go home until they had. He went to bed about 5 hours later aided by my Mum and just fell asleep, never to wake up again. They had been married nearly 60 years. My Mum was distraught. She told us to carry on with our trip, but a call from my Cousin said I should go home, so within 3 hours we were at the airport in Vancouver, waiting for a flight home when we should have been boarding our cruise. My Mum needed us and it was the right thing to do.
I was a real Daddy's girl and this hit me hard. A couple of weeks running around with Mum and sorting out the things that needed to be done; then the funeral; then.......... nothing. I had time on my hands. Nothing to do apart from spending time with my Mum every day, and it hit me. My Dad wasn't coming back. No more Daddy Daughter chats about Football and stupid comedians my Mum hated. No more "Daddy do" chores for him to do at my house. Simply No more Dad. I fell apart behind closed doors, after being strong for my Mum, and had a bit of a breakdown. I couldn't return to my job for several weeks as I have a stressful job which required my full attention.
I went off reading completely and couldn't pick up a book. Someone recommended this book to me, and it took me 12 months to read it as I got quite emotional at times.
The book was a great comfort. It's a book of other peoples stories, similar in some cases to my own and their thoughts and coping mechanisms. It's full of quotes, and religious quotes at the end of each chapter. I'm not religious in the slightest but they still made sense, although I would have liked a little less about religion. There are many books out there, and each person who wants to read one, will find their own comfort in a book in different ways. It is well written and I'm glad I read it, even though it took me 12 months as it did help me in some ways.
Thank you Dad for helping me be the person I am today.